A Word from Nancy

Welcome to the first issue of Etiquette Economics™.

The purpose of Etiquette Economics is to give you timely and easy-to-use etiquette information that will help you professionally and personally.

We all want success in our lives. One of the keys to success is the ability to respect details and differences in others, those things that make them unique and special. Yes, I said respect. The difference between paying attention and paying respect – or, truly getting to know others – is monumental.

It is my privilege to explain why and how the often-used expression “mind your manners” has never been more important. By using your mind (intelligence) and demonstrating appropropriate behavior (manners), you create a presence. This presence is what distinguishes you from others, shapes your identity in society and helps educate our younger generation.

This issue gives you information on honorifics, offers some tips for toasting and, in time for Valentine’s Day, a few heart-felt suggestions.

Please feel free to e-mail your questions or, better yet, call me, and I will answer your Etiquette Economics™ questions personally.

Let’s get to work. After all, time well spent makes good sense – now more than ever.

Sincerely yours,
Nancy Gorczynski
Director & Founder
The Etiquette & Protocol School

Toasting Tips

The rules are simple for both social and professional toasting. Begin, be brief and be seated.

Toasting skills demonstrate confidence and social savvy and help set the tone of a business meeting or personal occasion.

• Rise to the occasion. Stand up to offer your toast. Give your welcome toast at the beginning of the meal. For a Valentine’s toast, the host might say, “Here is to a great dinner and a Happy Valentine’s Day.” For a professional dinner, the host might say, “Welcome everyone, and thank you for joining me for our annual dinner.”

• Toast your guest of honor
  at the end of the meal or
  during the dessert course.

• When you are the recipient
  of a toast, do not drink to
  yourself. Acknowledge the
  gesture with a simple “thank you.”

• If you are the guest of honor, it is correct to offer a toast to your host after you have been toasted.
  

Mr. President

Do you know what an honorific is? An honorific is a title of respect. We often see honorifics in abbreviated form. Mr., Mrs., Ms. and Fr. are all honorifics. Not long ago, it was customary for a younger person to address a more mature person or a police officer with an honorific.

Today, proper protocol suggests using an honorific in any situation in which you are addressing a person of authority or distinction. Allow recipients of the honorific to give you permission to use their first name, then thank them.

Etiquette Economics for Honorifics

• The use of a first name is a privilege, even if the person does not realize it. Using honorifics demonstrates your professionalism and sophistication. It is always better to err on the side of formality rather than informality.

• Ms. is the correct honorific to use for all business correspondence to women. It removes the possibility of assuming anything personal and getting into an uncomfortable discussion.

• The world keeps changing, and it is important to stay current, so use current resources to ensure you are using correct forms of address. An incorrect honorific can make or break a business deal. This is especially crucial in our global economy. A vital resource is Mr. Robert Hickey’s book, “Forms of Address.”

• Never give yourself an honorific. For example, it can be off-putting to say: “Hello, my name is Dr. Garcia.” Better to say: “Hello, my name is Sara Garcia. I am Chief of Cardiology at St. John’s Hospital.” This introduction makes another person feel more at ease. It is also simpler to start a conversation when you tell something about yourself.

Etiquette Economics Question of the Month Is it appropriate to send an e-mail Valentine? Let us know what you think. Click here to send your answer to etiquetteanswer@optonline.net Readers’ answers – and our comments – will be posted in the March issue of Etiquette Economics.

The Etiquette and Protocol School
11 Divan Way
Wayne, NJ 07470

Email: etiquetteanswer@optonline.net
Telephone: (973) 839 - 2231
Fax: (862) 248 - 0583

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